terrible days

yesterday and today have been the worst days so far. i feel very stretched to the limit at this time. and so very tired too, not enought sleep i know. i cant wait to see pat when i get back from church tonight. he makes everything much more tolerable.

today

i had a badish kind of day today. i got up feeling not so good this morning. i had to lay back down for a while. when i got up i felt better but my mood had been terrible all day for the most part.
my neighbor down the street gave us a love seat for our new place. i did not yet get my second letter from pat that should have come today. it depressed me but he called me unexpectedly even though i wished for him to call me so that was good and i felt a bit better afterward. i took the bed off the rails and set the mattress and box spring on the floor.

this afternoon

i took a very short nap. wish i t had been a longer one. i still feel terrible. i made some brownies and then did the dishes. i had a salad for lunch. but i ate that before i laid down. maybe eating a brownie will soften my mood a bit and make things less overpowering?

up early

i am up early today but still feeling the blahs today. i imagine that the only thing that would bring me out of them would be a letter in the mail now. or maybe a phone call, but i don't have enough minutes on my phone.

i have to make a phone call today so i need to borrow my youngest son's phone for the day today. it sucks.

blah

still i did not get a letter from pat today. i don't know why i haven't got one this week. it disturbs me. i was having a little better day but it nags at me no letter......it is just not normal.

i am tired and hurting so i think i am just going to bed now.